Dear May,
I have 2 friends that also not yet recover from their relationship. I saw their msn title all put "Waiting" in English or Japanese. If I saw those messages last time, I will ignore them. But now I totally understand their feel. I don know I will become one of them or not, keep on waiting you back or I will find another one later. But from their life I know that, waiting is torture but they just cannot control their selves. They cannot accept new relationship but keep on thinking about old relationship. I don know when they can stand up and accept a new relationship but I know that’s very hard. I can predict myself from them.

So I start ask my friends to introduce new girls to me, start online look for net love or what, just want to recover from your hurt since you call him as husband already. Just 1 month time can make your heart totally changed. I really cannot expect that. I do not want myself to keep waiting for you. I want to wake up; I want to be the top in the future. I cannot stop my foot here. I don want to update my blog by writing letter to you. That’s what I tell myself this morning. But now, I still keep on thinking about you. Maybe I really will become my friends’ style? Pretend nothing happen for whole life but cannot accept new relationship? Just stubborn and feel that you are the best and let other better go? I don know. I already bore about those consoles, counseling or what. If really that easy recover from this pain, them this world will not have that much romantic or sad poem or song. But 1 thing is correct, I need to be more hardworking. Only if I success then only next time I can chase you back and give you a better life……

Haiz, today is holiday. Where you go with your bf? Tomorrow you will update your Friendster or msn picture again? Can I control myself not to view your Friendster and msn?